Motivation

Motivation.

Where does it come from, where does it go? How do you get it, and why do people lose it?

Motivation is a fluid concept that ebs and flows through moments, minutes, days, or weeks. Sometimes it comes easily like rain in the summer. Sometimes it doesn’t happen no matter how hard you try (like that perfect risotto….).

To be perfectly honest, I’m really struggling with my motivations right now. Today was a battle¬†to get out of bed. I sat there for 30 minutes – already late – just arguing with myself about how¬†I could call in sick and work and just stay in bed.

Plot twist: I went to work. I stayed there all day too.

I’ve been experiencing anxiety-fueled nightmares (call me Freud..) about work. I sometimes go the day without even having breakfast or lunch because my stomach won’t stop churning.

But why? On Friday, in our one-on-one my manager questions my motivation to actually succeed here. “Is this what you actually want?” I lied and said yes when I should have said “No, but this is a stepping stone to what I really want, and as long as you allow me to step across to my goals, I will work really hard to get there with this company”.

I don’t see how that answer would have been supported. So I lied and said yes. Who wants an employee that isn’t 100% dedicated to a career with their company?

So now I’m floundering in my own shortcomings and failings to succeed here, at a job that I like but don’t love, pretending to be happy.

 

S.

 

Advertisements

I’m So Glad to be a Working Gal Again.

Today marks 1 month at my new job. Hooray!

My first job out of highschool was working for a bank. I was driven, determined and motivated to climb that corporate ladder. I remember the excitement and sense of accomplishment when I got my very own business cards. I had dreams to grow my empire. Unfortunately, that company wasn’t the right place to do it. My drive was halted, my determination was pushed back, my motivation was gone. So I moved cities to find something more. The first steps were tentative – I took the first job I was offered. But it didn’t have the same feeling. I was good at it, but there was no challenge. No opportunity to be more than a number. But it was a gateway to something more.

Now, after 18 months in this new city, after many an unexpected hurdle (both personally and professionally…), I got real lucky. I now work as a recruitment consultant in a smallish branch in Brisbane that’s part of a global brand. The international opportunities are something I’ve only dreamed of, but HELLO REALITY, I’m here for this! #corporateworld

I’ve had 7 years of practice selling other companies products that have given me the tools to sell my self – my skills, personality, and capability. With this, I can be my own brand. I can rely on myself for my success. I’m fostering relationships with existing clients, I’m creating relationships with new clients. I look after my own book. And the rewards for that work come back to me. I get out what I put in. Plain and simple. And I love it.

The little icing on this beautiful cake is of course the people I work with. It’s a small team, but so much change has happened (before I came in) to make it a great team. We have the right people, the right personalities, the right level of fun and competition. It’s makes for a great office to spend my days in.

I’m still learning (gosh there’s so much new stuff to learn!), and it’s challenging every day. But I’m up for it. I can do this.

I actually have a career now, not just a mindless job.

 

S.